You’re the only one of you in the room
If you’re a wine enthusiast that prefers white wine then you’re a rare bird. A word to the wise, be careful with mixed company! Admitting you’re a fan of white wines to other wine people is a risky thing to do – it’s like being a skier in a group of snowboarders. It’s like being a vegetarian at an Austin Barbecue joint. (You better be ready to eat some plain white bread.)
White wine is cheap therefore you have cheap taste
This slippery slope of a logical fallacy is a favorite choice of red wine lovers. They’ve undoubtably noticed that many white wines are less expensive than red wines and it leads to the assumption that white wines are lower quality. Not true. Here’s some ammo next time this happens to you:
- Firstly, the advancement of wine technology has made white winemaking more cost effective. There are now super high-end tools (like uber-fancy specialized pneumatic white wine presses, temperature-controlled stainless steel tanks, etc) that make processing white wine grapes easier and faster than ever before. In many ways, technology for white wines is leaps and bounds ahead of red wines.
- Secondly, most white wines do not require extra time in cellar for aging, nor do they require oak aging. Time is costly, and so is oak.
- Finally, the popularity of white wines is lower on the high end (remember that 3 to 1 estimation above?), making the supply-demand economics different. (This is fantastic news for white wine lovers, if you look at the positive side.)
Actually. On second thought. You shouldn’t say anything at all. More for us.
You’re obviously not that serious about wine
Ever read wine descriptions? Why do red wines get all the best ones? Why can’t a white wine be “rich,” “brooding,” and “thoughful?”
Just because a wine is light-bodied and fun to drink doesn’t mean it’s not serious. This is the same backward logic that allows crappy dramas into the Oscars while outstanding comedies don’t even get nominated. It takes a great deal of talent to make delicious Mosel Riesling, Albariño, and Chenin Blanc. Also, pour one out for comedy. We need that sh*t right now.
White wines don’t age, thus they’re low quality
Besides the fact that this statement is just flat-out wrong, ageability isn’t always a prerequisite for quality. Certainly there are many red wines that reach their peak after a decade or so of aging. But, some wines are meant to be fresh! That said, if you’re being hounded on this point, here are a few examples of white wines that age longer than most reds:
- Rioja Blanco (crazy-kickass white from Spain lives up to 20 years)
- Vintage Champagne (upwards of 50 years)
- PX (aka Pedro Ximinez – not a guy’s name. This wine is sweet and starts tasting great at around 30 years and gets even better after that)
- Boal Madeira (~100 years)
Honestly, there were at least 4 more points to make, but then a delicious bottle of Riesling melted the frustration away. Wine doesn’t solve problems, but it does put them in time out.
So now it’s your turn.
You don’t have to be quiet anymore. #whitewinelover